Jaws

Jaws. Godzilla. Suniel Shetty trying to dance.

These were some of the scary images that were flashing across my mind as I stood there trying to get my first statement together. I was standing infront of the first-year MCS class of Fergusson College in July, 2008. And I was extremely nervous. At this moment, the idea of doing something different and following my personal interest of teaching seemed such a bad decision. But let's start from the beginning.

I have always had a strange fascination for attending lectures. Ofcourse, the purpose was never to listen to the material that you are supposed to listen to, but do everything else possible. Activities like playing pranks, throwing chalk pieces or paper balls at others, cracking PJs that make others bang their heads in disgust, have always interested me more. And the fact that you are not supposed to do this in the class adds an extra incentive and fun factor in doing these things. Also, the boredom of attending the lecture motivates you to higher and unheard-of heights in generating various methods of timepass.

After having passed out of college, I had this idea in mind of giving back to the world what I had gotten from it. In short, the idea of having hapless students sitting infront of me, squirming in their seats, counting down the time to end of the lecture, always held fascination in my mind.

It took many years for that to bear fruit. And one day, I got the call to conduct lectures at Fergusson College on one of my favorite subjects - algorithms.

And that is how here I was today, standing infront of all the students while their gazes bored down upon me.

I suppose the greatest fear that a newbie lecturer has is the fear of the raised hand. The Raised Hand of the Doubt. The hand that signifies that some student wants some clarifications from you. What is more scary is that infact the student believes that you would be able to clarify that doubt.

This fear haunted me too and that is what had made me so nervous. Ofcourse, I had thought about various strategies of countering that. These strategies ranged from the ridiculous to the suave. Avoid looking at the students was the first on my list. I thought I should deliver the lecture looking at some remote corner of the classroom, maybe the top-left corner. As if I am looking into space thinking deeply, or, that corner holds something of such interest that I am unable to take my eyes off it. Or, look at the fans, benches, walls - anything but the students. Ofcourse, there were always the traditional and classic replies like "We will look into this tomorrow", "That is what I want YOU to find out", etc.

I started my lecture with trepidation. Time passed and the nervousness increased. The more material I was presenting, higher was the probability of a doubt getting asked. As the lecture progressed, I started avoiding the gazes of the students and attempted looking at some corner. A spider there stared back angrily at me. Perhaps it had its own domestic woes to deal with.

More time passed. The lecture was nearing its end. And finally, Time Over. No doubts asked. And having finished the lecture, I zoomed off out of the class. I was happy. I was free. And it infact turned out to be a great experience for me.

I am still here now teaching and have survived bullets, missile attacks and grenades in the form of various types of doubts. And I am fit and fighting. The class has supported me a lot and I thoroughly enjoy giving me lecture.

Mickey Mouse. Gazelles. Suniel Shetty not allowed to dance.

Harmless images floating across my mind now. I am at peace.